Wow....I don't know the answer to this question really....this one is tough. I try very hard to not allow toxic people in my life...there are few that are there because they need to be- I wouldn't get rid of them because of the ripple effect that would have on my life- if I didn't know them then I wouldn't know someone else and that person is important to me.
So I will take a bit of a different spin on this one I guess. I wish that there was part of myself that I could let go- send into the wind and never see again....that part of me...the part that is scared, has nightmares, flashes back to those bad moments....I with I could make that part go away. I don't want it anymore. I think that I have learned all that I can from those experiences and I wish I could just let part of me go. I know that I can't....I know that every single day I use those experiences, and what I learned, to make decisions in my life. Not necessarily in a bad way, but you are made up of a million threads, all interwoven together. Those threads are what make the whole picture. if you pull one out, you ruin the picture. I certainly don't want to change who I am today...and those experiences are all part of that...but part of me- I want to let that part go....into the wind. I want to watch it float away, carried on the wind current, over the water until it is a speck on the horizon and eventually you can't see it at all.
About Me
- colenic
- Trying to remember that there is always a reason, always something that makes you smile during the day- recognizing the event, person or situation that made you smile will make your day seem that much better.
truer words were never spoken... although we don't like some parts of our past, parts that truly give us bad dreams or anxiety attacks, they all helped shape who we are today.
ReplyDeleteif God allowed us to go back and re-live parts, skipping the things that were really bad, would we be the same people today? i think not. it took all of my life (the good, the bad, and the really awful/painful/nasty) to make me who i am.
you're really letting go of stuff without even realizing it.
I agree with Teresa - I guess our past (both good and bad) makes us the people we are today and, hopefully, makes us better for it. But I know what you mean about wanting to let a certain part of you go. I just hope that the part of you that has nightmares and makes you scared, doesn't come along very often.
ReplyDeleteThis was a great post. In time it will get easier and easier to push that stuff back in your head and not think of it as much. But yes it is what makes you the wonderful you we've come to know.
ReplyDeleteHugs.
"...you are made up of a million threads, all interwoven together. Those threads are what make the whole picture, if you pull one out you ruin the picture. I certainly don't want to change who I am today..."
ReplyDeleteGosh I love this paragraph, it is just beautiful. Thankyou for the reminder.
Great post. You speak for me to :)
I don't know how you put it into words so perfectly! I agree with everyone else: even though it's a sad topic... the way you put it is just beautiful.
ReplyDelete