Scary

this has been a scary weekend..
not because of the goblins and ghouls that have graced our doorstep..
but because of a phone cal I got on Friday night...
My grandmother had a stroke on Friday..
She's okay..
she apparently has had these for the past few years...
there have been a myriad of tests, phone calls in the middle of the night..
information relayed over the phone by my mother..
I almost jumped on a plane...
I hope that I don't regret the decision not to.
She's had a good life,
but I am not ready to lose her yet..
She and my grandfather have always been there...
their love showing all of us how marriage is supposed to be..
a mom
an ear
a hug
a drink
conversations around the table..
she always knows what to say..
what to do..
she's always been there for me..
and I couldn't be there now..
I know that it is the responsibility of a parent to protect their kids...
and that's what my parents have been doing..
but I am scared...
Afraid of losing this amazing woman..
Logically I know, she's 76 years old..
She's had an amazing life..
she's ready to go home...regardless of what the dr says to her..
I will ask...plea for positive thoughts...healing prayers...whatever you can put out to the universe for her...
because like it or not..
I feel like I am ten years old again..
wanting to hear her voice...
wanting to get a hug...
wanting to make it better for her...like she has always done for me..
I know that I can't do that...I can't make it all better....but I will send up a prayer and a thought...for a recovery...for the ability to hug her and tell her I love her when I go down there in a few weeks for Thanksgiving..
I appreciate whatever thoughts and prayers you send up...the power of the blogosphere...
Give your loved ones a hug tonight...for me...for them..and tell them you love them....
Hugs and love to all of you..